Hair Journey Thing

So i know it has been a while but I am back to write about this new thing that I want to embark upon. I was bored on Monday night and couldn’t sleep so I decided to get online like any other 21 Century person would. I don’t know how or why but I ended up looking for ways to grow my hair by using Google, and I came across this kid Dmac Version 1 on Youtube and decided to give his hair journey videos a watch. Even though I am bummed that it is going to take like a year for my hair to grow into a giant afro it should be worth it at the end. I figured I would do this thing just to get a giant afro for all of the sporting events I attend, but as I sat down over the last few days I have realized some things. I think that through this process I will be forced to be in situations and in areas where black people meet and congregrate.  I know I know, I look like I would be okay being there but I usually am never in the company of other Super tan American’s such as myself. I don’t really socialize that well unless they are like me. One thing that I have noticed is that I don’t care what anyone thinks of me and I will be Alec all day every day. A lot of time im seen as weird or crazy because I am not afraid to be myself in any situation. One big thing in the African American community is showing that you are a man and not afraid of anyone. That is just a weird concept to me…

Any ways I feel that this journey will do one major thing for me…. MAKE ME FINISH SOMETHING!!! If I can stick with this I may be able to also stick with a workout schedule and maybe even move forward with a business idea or an invention! I have tons of ideas all of the time and I can put them on paper but I never go anywhere with them; mainly because of my own lack of knowledge.  Well anyways I have started this thing and it has been 3 days so far and I am still going strong! Yay Me!

I will try and update this journey and experience as often as things happen and on a monthly basis with photos of my hair growth.

POGS Bitches POGS   

Tulip

This ones for the people who just sit idly by
the ones who never got to laugh and only made to cry
the ones who who held your head on that long night
the ones who held you close, safe, warm, and tight
Those people who were genuine and cared for you
that person who noticed every little thing you do
the ones who both hate and love to see you smile
the one who maybe hasnt been around for a while
that single, happy spark in your life at the right time
when just that persons voice could make you smile
this is for that guy that grits and bears it everyday
this is for that girl who sits by and waits for you to say
Say that you noticed their patience and see their pain
and that you've come now to change their loss into gain
to reciprocate their hidden a buried emotions
to believe in them and concede to their notions
but that will never come to pass
so they will continue to sit and amass,
these emotions that they feel for you
and fantasize of dreams not true.
Friends are great and friends are awesome
and it can be better if friendship can blossom.

:)

POGS

USF Softball Fan Dance

Just a little dance w/ me and my girl Girl Scout for our USF Softball team!! Check it!

Van Wilder Syndrome

Okay soo I have been meaning to write this for a while...which basically means that I have been suppressing my emotions, just like any other good male. Whatever, so what I wanted to talk about for a long time is my career here in college. I call it a career because it is the longest thing, besides life, that I have done consistently to date. Even now that I have a Bachelors I am still hanging around college students and going to parties; ya know not really moving on with my life I guess. That's just it though; what is it that is really waiting for me beyond the threshold of college? Is it this world of unknown opportunities or a world of bend over and take it for years, just to never fully reach a position of any real influential decision making? It took me 5 years to graduate because mainly I have the mind of an Engineer trapped inside of the personality of a Extrovert!  I wish I had found my current group of friends when I transferred over here, but sadly my brain knows that is a logical impossibility because I would have been out of school and on to a career that I would suffer in for years if I graduated on time. I know that the punctuation's aren't correct (if they are let me know!) but i blame that on the math and a little bit on the rambling. Any who I am going to break this para/powergraph up because its boring.

Ahhh thats a bit better. Okay, so this thing college that we all pay a boat load for is sadly something that some of the worlds richest, not wealthy, people have never attended because it was a waste of time and ground in a theoretical nature. Its hard to write with that playing in the background lol. I don't really know what the point of  this rambling was other than to express the fact that I am 7 years into this life stlye and I understand that the pressures of society want me to "grow up", but let me tell you something as you read. I am optimistic and crazy because I have grown up way more that a kid should have in his younger years and I have bottled up a lot of things that I am learning to let go slowly but surely. I am not an open book because I never have had that luxury. I am an African American male who takes people for who they are and not their Religion, Creed, Status, Sexual Orientation, Beliefs, Disbeliefes, or their Race (which is a falicy created to produce a validation in humanities difference and evolutionary traits). You are who you are and your gunna do what your going to do; so really all i can do is try my best to be your friend/associate for the time being and possibly longer.

P.S.- Old school love songs are my thing so I have this need/want to LOVE someone........

"When you have been through a lot in your life and have decided not to let it define you your actions may come of as being childish. Those of us who know where you are know better on the other hand. We know its just Calculated Optimism."- Alec 

Peace Out Girl Scouts

6am Political Ti-raid

Okay so I just need to say this... Flying Spaghetti Monster

STOP LISTENING TO OTHER PEOPLES OPINION AND USING THAT AS THE ONLY BASIS FOR OUR DECISION MAKING.

Basically what I am saying is people like Glen Beck should not be allowed to talk. By no means am I against freedom of the press but people go to court everyday over defamation of character. Yet, it seems that when it comes to politics that all gets thrown out the window, on both sides. I myself do not want to be a politician, so that argument is out, because I have this moral code that may get me elected but will get me no where because of my not wanting to play hardball. I have always felt that it was absurd for politicians to have any other money given to them, other than the salary I am already paying for out of my paycheck. You may ask why? Why all of a sudden is a black guy writing about politics now that there is a black-ish president. Well I will tell you simply in the way it was put to me in my 11th grade AP American History class. My teacher was talking to us about presidents and said, "there are some unwritten rules about being the president: Being a male, Being a christian, Being white....." Ever since I was a kid I never even gave the notion to there ever being a black president, but once I saw one get elected I knew that this was going to end one of two ways. This was either going to be a great chance for our country to actually get past its racial divide and open the country to other ways of thinking, or this was going to crash and burn to ensure another minority never gets elected again. I myself an an Independent, probably just as another way for me to avoid another inalienable stereotype, but its mainly because the right person is the right person regardless of blind party voters. If I could only ask one question to every blue collar Republican or Democrat it would be simply, " What has your party ever done for you and people in your situation?"

Look I am just tired of how the mudslinging has been horrible, and I mean atrocious over the last 5 years. No other president has ever had to show a birth certificate! I am only angry about this because I know I am probably going to have a child someday, and more than likely that child will be mixed. If a well educated and intelligent American citizen who has proved his political pedigree over and over again cant get a fair chance because he happens to have a higher level of melanin content than his predecessors, then what kind of shot does a child like mine have at achieving that dream.

I black and as far as i know in no way evil sooo...Fuck you Mormons(early ones who dont think for themselves)!


Peace Out Girl Scouts

1st Poem

I am curious as to what you think. So please give me some feedback because I finally just let my mind float as I decided to write this poem. I am sure that the jumbled thoughts that are in my heard are expressed here in some cryptic ( not really) form or fashion. This is only called my 1st poem because I think that this is truly the first poem i wrote without any other thought than, "Write a poem from withing." .......Its a bit long but I hope you enjoy!

I feel like letting the words flow 

so simply that I'll know 

the what I am say is true 

and not just a show put on for you

I don't want to write about love

or beauty sent down form up above,

because that's not true that's not real

for self-esteem i can see the appeal, 

but I want the lust, the passion, the waves

So I can recant the ways,

That I want you, I need you, I feel you

the way that just a glance make me feel for you,

you who makes life more than just a game 

one who Id gladly stand out in the rain, with 

just to hold you close and see your face

just to see how alive i feel in this place 

wrapped in your embrace, horizontal, vertical, at a slight angle 

sitting here thinking of calling you an angel 

but I know that wont work, it never does

unless your a looks 1 percenter then that's the cause 

hopelessly romantic or hopelessly romantically frantic 

the thoughts would drive a sane man manic 

into depression with fits of rage and joy 

thoughts of bliss will only play coy 

a tug on the strings, a girl with no wings 

but still as beautiful as ever 

insistence as light as a feather  

I want to see you first 

and prepare for the worst 

I want to see you 

then be you 

I want to like you 

then lust you

and if the moment is right, and not just the hype

of me finding your favor, and seeing you later 

maybe just maybe lu can escape 

but pulled back quick for its mistake 

then spilled forth to give validation 

I guess I can love you, given my situation

Peace Out Girl Scouts 

Yay me!

Okay so I understand that these posts aren't too appealing, because mainly because I seem to only write when I am angry or depressed. Sadly enough it has a lot to do with the fact that I a black. There i said it, I am just tired of beating around the bush and making awesome references to it. Today, or should I say tonight, I saw a photo of myself with some friends by the pool and I realized that I am much darker than even I perceived myself to be. Now you may be asking yourself why that even matters?...Well i will tell you. It may come as a surprise but the darker I am, statistically, the fewer opportunities I will have in my life. I dunno I feel like I may be a little bit happier if I had my mothers lighter skin complexion. Oh, and let me tell anyone who is rolling their eyes...IT IS NOT FUCKING EASY BEING BLACK AND NOT "ACTING" BLACK. On a lighter note, I like white girls and the WHOOTY is my favorite thing in the world now!

Oh My Gosh Becky Look at Her Butt.............. fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap..........Toonchie 

If you knew me in my every day life then you would know how much I try to smile and be a very uplifting person. I have a lot of personal philosophies, which seem to come out a lot when I am drunk, and a lot of them revolve around how to make other people happy. One is  that I feel that every woman is beautiful and deserves to hear it from time to time. I say this as much as I can and its usually pretty obvious when I am calling someone beautiful because I am interested. I only say this because I have had a bit of a bad streak with telling bigger women they are beautiful. By the way I am upset when I see a black guy with a really big white girl, and I understand that it is there choice, but dammit it makes it hard for me to hit on cute girls at parties!  

I swear my depression has ADD which I am sure is actually a good thing.

I gotta see that again....

POGS!!!

Tired

Okay so I fell like this statement needs to be made. I Alec Mathews am a Straight Male who like…Nay! Loves women. I also associate myself with anyone who has a personality that I like; it doesn’t matter to me if they are Gay, Lesbian, Bi-sexual, or Transgender. I love all of my friends and I wouldn’t ask them to change for the world. I am very secure in my sexuality and understand the liminal space that others shy away from. I have only this left to say... If you can't accept me for the person I am or the people around me who enrich this one life that I get then sadly I do not need you in it. I would like you to be, because the sharing of information is how we grow, but still a closed off mind is not welcome. Thank You

I had to make this statement earlier because I had some "concerns" about my sexuality as far as my family is concerned. I will not lie I have always felt slightly like an outcast in my own family and in my community as a whole, besides a few select people who didn't car about the way I acted or talked. I would also like to mention that it is very taxing living a double life, and I cannot fathom having to deal with what I am sure some of my friends have had to deal with for years. Its a sadly normal thing to watch people be ex-communicated from a family or religion because of their sexual orientation, but it is just a bit weird for me to realize that people are outcasts in their own families simply because of the level of their education and an open mind. I myself have always felt included in my own family but not really ever as one of their own but more as the one of our family who will give monetary credit to our family name and subsequently to the African american race at the same time. Now tell me; would you know what to do with your life with not only the pressure of your family on your back but and entire fucking race that has hundreds of thousands of people you have never even been a spec inside of their existence too? Either way I refuse to change who I am  because that is what people love about me and why my circle of friends is as large as it is, and why I can typically walk into any place across this country, mind you, and make friends anywhere I go. Also my main reason now for being me is so that hopefully I can be a role model to that kid growing up like me; feeling out of place all the time because of how a lot of his "skin color" acts, or because of how he is accepting of others and very neutral in most situations, or just purely needs to see someone and say hey, he did it and he had to overcome a lot to get there and now I feel like my life has purpose. If I can make one persons day directly or indirectly I can exit this world at the end of my stay as happy as I can be, because i would have done something that a lot of people seem to refuse to do today...

LEAVE OUR CHILDREN WITH A BETTER SITUATION THAN WHAT WE HAD TO DEAL WITH!!!!!!!

POGS...YouOnlyDieAwesome!! YODA!

Connection

Okay so i feel like I talk about this a lot but I can't help it since every time I talk to my parents they shove it down my throat.

SOoooooooo Anywyz....... My mom sent me a txt message, on her new fangled smart phone, asking me to take a LOVE survey to see if I could out score my mother and my sister. So since I am currently unemployed and have nothing better to do, I did it. I got a 2.......out of 10. I guess that would really explain my current "Love" situation.

http://www.lovecapacity.com/

Your Love Capacity Score Is: 2 - Confused

You are better at receiving love than you are at giving love but WE KNOW that you can love at a greater capacity. You need the right person to bring out of you all of the love that you have inside to offer. 


I feel like a love guru now. I always find my self giving advice on Love and things like that, and all of the advice seems to work. Its like a virgin giving sex tips to a Pornstar!

Look I know the issues that I have in my own love life and all I can do is share mine to help you possibly avoid some of the same pitfalls.



I Hate bowling at the moment by the way Fuck this Sport/Game.

POGS

L.O.V.E.

Im not really sure why I am writing, because im in a kind of funk which must alternatively mean that I am on my Period!!! Yay! Guys you have them so stop bitching and complaining and throwing weights around a gym to seem macho, and embrace the few days. Any ways I will just say that if you are in a relationship or are looking to enter one of these torturous things anytime soon. You will do well to remember this one simple thing, COM-MUTHAFUCKING-MUNICATE! Communication is the key to any and all actual successful relationships plain and simple. Also I have to mention that these things arent easy and no one side is ever the right one. Relationships take a lot of work and if you get to the point where you can truly say that you love the other person, then you will have to come face to face with their upturns and pitfalls.

This song has just been speaking volumes to me for the last like hour.

I can't really think of anything else to say other than, if you really and truly love someone then you need to learn what makes them tick and know everything about them. You will want to no what makes them angry so that you can try your best to be as good a companion as you can be. Compromise. Compromise. Compromise. And if you can't GET THE FUDGE OUTTA THERE!!! Don't stick around and drag down someone elses life just so you can be in a relationship for a little while longer. Do the right thing and continue to be you because in the end your the only one that truly knows you and what is going on inside your head and heart. 

Peace Out Girl Scouts 

Motivation

Okay so I would like to thank Steph Galvin for prompting me to write this post because of her post. Oh yea read her blog! Way better than the inherent ramblings of mine! lol Read it!

Anyways I was talking with my friend today and she said those three simple words that I hate to hear...I...Love...You. If you arent my girlfriend, parents, siblings, family, or my best of friends... I dont want to hear it. If you are a girl that I am going after and you tell me you love me as a friend it will not get a great response from me. I guess this is mainly because I have a conditioned response now to when girls/women say that because of my lack of success, so to say. My condition response is just to say Uh Huh whenever it is said to me. It is proof that I have changed personally from a few years ago when this kind of thing came up.  I may have shrugged it off or have replied back with an I love you too a few years ago.



Any ways i think it is interesting how small things like this can have such a major impact in your life. im sure if my roommate was here while I was writing this he would spout out some random thing that he learned, in his time of having no life, about how life is an accumulation of all of the events you experience and there is no real change, only how we perceive our interactions. I understand why people put up walls and barriers in relationships with their friends, family and loved/like ones. On a lighter note, I don't mind the change that has occurred within me to much, besides my ambition to succeed. My friends have said that I am somewhat of an asshole now, you are welcome ladies lol, but I am like a nice kinda asshole....wait, what?!! I know, It made no sense to me either until one of my friends finally explained it. She basically said that I said mean things but in a way that made you laugh; I was apparently nice enough to make people still like me.  Yay Me!!!

Anywho! I think everyone should take a long hard look at what has happened to them in their life and realize how they got to where you are. Let you Haters Hate and revel in the person that is YOU.


POGS

Ring Ring

 

Me me me me me me me me me me... okay so I have not really written a post about me that didn't somehow end up on another rant about nothing. So basically all I can say is that this is mainly…probably…more than likely end up in a rant about my topic. That topic is…(drums please) you people and your bullshit when it comes to being “friends” and the crap that is the social networking friendship.

Okay so first of all I have a very infectious personality, or so I am told, but my personality does not seem to make what most would consider lasting relationships. They could possibly be long lasting friendships, mainly because my brain gets bored doing just one thing for very long, but it seems that people today don’t want to put in the work for much of anything. A life lesson that I have learned from the older people in my life as I grew up was, “Don’t ever intentionally burn bridges, because you will never know when you may need to cross them.” If you are looking for a more intuitive life approach I suggest reading my friend Sarah Ann Weavers blog. Any ways, and of course I got off topic again, I find it completely B O L O G N A that people have the nerve to say that you never talk or call them in the day and age we have. If you have a Facebook it is simple to stop by a page and post saying hi or how are you. It is even easier to contact someone if you have a mobile device with txt messaging capabilities. It only slightly makes me angry when people stop talking to you because life gets too “busy” or whatever. I know me and I have a problem opening up to people and I know it can be an issue, but if I don’t constantly share every grimy and personal detail of my life doesn’t mean you can’t talk to me when were in a different proximity. Oh and another thing which is a bit of my own and ancient good advice… NEVER EVER EVER!!! Leave your friends behind for someone you are dating! It is dumb and stupid of you to break ties to longer relationships than the person you are getting it on with at the moment.  

OMG one of the truest songs ever written and sung beautifully/ horribly! 

Peace Out Girl Scouts 

NCAA and Sports

Okay so having a few NCAA athletes in my family I think that there are a few minor....i mean big issues with the way they approach Education vs Sports. The purpose of the NCAA is to be a governing body for student athletes. Right? Or are they just a big organization created to take advantage of the massive amounts of money that a students love for their alma mater will spend to see their schools sports prosper? Eh, I don't really know but I do know that it dosent seem like they are very catering to the athletes who are not going pro and are not looking to just get a degree and get out. What is the point of going to college athlete of not if the education of that athlete does not validate college sports?

I don't really know what else to write about so in light of a short post I will now post a video to make you laugh

Still pretty short I know but my anger has subsided during the course of this written rant. I still think that there are things that can be fixed but it will always be a broken system. There needs to however be a shift into the student part of a student athlete.

POGS

Made in ?????

I don't understand the concept of transporting not only originally Made in America things and jobs to the middle east and China. We claim that America is a land of power and of opportunity; but it is looking like the opportunity will come to you if you don't leave your country. If I call a computer company I am greeted by the reassuring voice of an american machine voice, and then abruptly put on hold and transferred half way across the world to a call center in India with a person who has just completed a course in English ( insert frustration and anger). Now big businesses and organizations look to save a few pennies/dollars on every product they make, not to break even, but to raise their bottom line. It is more cost effective to have things made at a quarter the price in china and then shipped over to a distribution warehouse and then just shipped to the store and bought by you. Yay supply chain!!!

No offense to small business owners and those even better off, but if you are netting over $250,000 a year after you have paid for business expenses and everything $1,000 isn't really that big of a deal. Go back to your college days ( those of you that didn't have daddy/mommies money) remember how that deal for 5 bucks was where you would eat that day, keeping change to save up for certain things, carpooling to save gas, walking places/ waiting for college club night. Money use to be spent wisely and now a drop in your bucket throws you for a loop. Poor people are Democrats and when they start making money they become Republicans lol...true trend. Those who have no money say help me help me, and those who have money say i want to keep my money.  Capitalism is great and so is the Free Market economy! 

CONGRESS DO YOUR JOBS DAMMIT!!! For the people not for some people.

Peace out girl scouts   

Boys in Blue

Fuck the Police!

Oh wait im shot someone call 911! 

Who did this? 

The family wants answers  

Fuck the police! 

yall are always around when we don't want you

yall are never around when we need you

Fuck the police 

Wait...what? 

I need you and appreciate you 

I can't even begin to imagine what it is like being a police officer every day. Knowing that any day some punk with a gun can end your life and hurt your family because the don't want a ticket. I can't imagine what it is like to catch someone, send them to jail and then watch there money and a technicality get them out of a sentence. I just cannot fathom being on the hit list for people who are breaking the law. But police profile and that should be illegal...Wait stereotypes are wrong as well, but they are based on truths as well. I would rather them stereotype and profile ( if its cross cultural and based on more than skin tone and car type) than not and let something potentially deadly slip by. I know I know its not a perfect system and I want white people to not be afraid of black, Muslims, middle-easterners, and all minorities ( to include social outcasts) that arent trying to fit into the majorities mold of a proper citizen. To protect and serve is what they are here to do and as citizens we can help them accomplish this. I am not backing dirty cops at all in this post just FYI....I hope you all get caught and rot in jail as well.  5-0 Love boo boo! Need you always around in this lovely love hate relationship that goes on everyday.


Peace Out Girl Scouts

Acceptance

Okay so all I really have to say is... You should watch these videos and really listen to what these kids and these families have to say. Conservatives are typically against anomalies until they are face with one. Believe it or not it happens, believe it or not its real, believe it or not it can happen to you. This life is about you until you have a child, at that moment it becomes about them and their generation. So why not make it a happy one for all of them to live in free and full of understanding because their parents were to busy hiding behind a book and some teachings of someone who has probably committed atrocities in their life time.

This show actually made me cry, and i never cry at anything, simply because these kids were so cute and adorable that I cant understand how adults could treat them the way they do, and in turn teach their children the same mannerisms. 8..(

Peace Out Girl Scouts 

Smarter America

I just find this photo hysterically funny. 

Okay so basically I can rant all day about the bullshit that every politician spews out of there mouth every time they get up on the stand. I have a valiant idea for the nation though.....and it's simple. GO TO YOUR COMPUTER AND DO SOME FUCKING RESEARCH!!!!, OR GO TO THE FRICKING PUBLIC LIBRARY (that your taxes pay to keep in operation)!!!! It could literally take 5-6 hrs to find out the truth about things, but you, and yes i mean you fat/lazy america, can figure out things on your own instead of letting a party affiliated news station do all of the thinking for you. This by the way is the type of socialistic/ communist type of system that all of the radical Americans tend to talk about all of the time...btdubs. There are people who try to scare you and there are people who try to help you. If a president gets elected and the other party controls either side of congress, then nothing will ever get done. The truth is that historically the Republican party and Democratic party swapped major political views. Republicans usually spend money and hope for a result, Democrats spend less and tax to reduce our trillions of dollars of national debt. Our country has gas reserves but wants to be able to sell it to other nations after the world runs out, Canada is also considering using the new pipeline to export oil out of the US. Republicans= big business, and Democrats= Small business. In a small bit of truth we are all a little bit liberal weather or not you want to believe it. My only mission is that you can go to websites that arent news outlets and get much much much better information. 

Peace Out Girl Scouts

Patent Bull

Okay so I am basically an inventor at heart and I love coming up with new ideas and I love taking things apart and completely forgetting how I took it apart! Now I am extremely peeved at the moment because I have had some great ideas and I have never patented any of them.You may be asking yourself, why? well I can say that I think that patents shouldn't be allowed until you have a working prototype to submit with the application. It sucks that someone can patent intellectual property and have the same idea as you, but can never do anything with the patent. This has happened to me twice now and it is beginning to get very very very annoying; granted the guy did have the idea 6 years ago but he still has done nothing with it!  What really " Grind's My Gears" is that even though this guy/woman/company has come up with the idea before me I would still have to pay them for the use of their idea. That my friends is grade A+ bullshit in my grand ole happy opinion. Oh and also I wish upon a star that I can get sent some investors to help me do what I want so I can be that rich entrepreneur that only important people know about.  Eh maybe it will change someday and make it better for inventors and for their successors.

On another note I am in love with this song at the moment.....Dont judge me ok...

The Doc is my hero btdubs....I need plutonium!!!

Peace Out Girl Scouts 

Knowing

Why is it that I want to know everything about the world and meet many different people? Yet there are still people in this world who only have an interest in how they can make my day worse. Anyways these people know who they are and they can go FuCk themselves, or jump off a bridge, whichever makes them happy and makes the world a better place. Any who, I have this thing for accents and let me tell you something...they drive me crazy and can be ironic at the same time. I also enjoy meeting new people from different backgrounds and walks of life. I find it funny that the most enchanting accent to me is that of the southern bell or a mid-west accent like Montana. I know I know it is really funny when you think of the historical parameters that surround the infatuation with that type of accent. What it really pans down to is that I am sure I will probably end up traveling the world and visiting many different lands. I want to learn every language I can, but I don't know anything other languages besides American lol.


I am in love with this chick btdubs. Annie Thorisdottir!!

..........I am sorry I will stop my drooling now. I am weird like that I guess...I mean that most people would not find super fit women attractive. Most men would probably be intimidated and feel emasculated by a strong woman, but not me! I don't know I have always been an athlete and I naturally find athletic women attractive and its more than just the body. I really think its something more of the mindset that they have thats probably a little more in line with my own; that is probably also why I have a thing for girls who later turn out to be lesbianas. I am pretty sure that I have hit on at least 10 lesbians, that my radar was off on, in the past 4 or 5 months. Now this may be a bit much for me.....A little fat in the right area goes a long way ;)

   

I .....I.....I really don't know what to say other than Damn girl who you flexin for!?!

Peace Out Girl Scouts 

Question for the Donkey

 

Unwritten Rules

Must be over 35

Must be a Christian

Must agree with party lines

.

…………..Wait did that say Christian? I am pretty sure that most republicans I see running are Christians and yet they seem to know nothing about it? I feel like in order to be part of a religion you should have a yearly equivalency exam to stay in good standing. Your standing shouldn’t be based on how much you give to the church or if you go every week. Make anyone who wants to use their religion on television take an exam given by scholars. Saying that you are one thing and then getting up and doing exactly the opposite is blasphemy in and of itself.  Now I know what you are thinking (actually I am lying I have absolutely no idea what you are thinking, but I’ll try anyways) and I can assure you that your anger is more than likely not justified. More than 90% of the world’s religions preach and/or teach one main philosophy,” Be kind to your fellow man”, for the sake of being PC, “your fellow person.”  Now the reason why I bring this up is because it just seems like politics in this country, and in others, seems to be driven by the all mighty dollar which I completely agree with oddly enough. If you think about it without the drive of money our lives would be the same as they were way back in….oh I dunno the dawn of time. Money and greed have sadly enough put that Iphone or android phone in your pocket. It has also put that AC unit in your house, and made you refrigerator crappy.  A quality product means no repeat business but a happy customer. Yes, they will recommend your company if you do make that great company, but once you sell everyone your product, and it never breaks, you will go out of business. I will say however that just because we make money dosent mean that we need all of it. We have taken lessons from the British and European dictators/royalty. Amass money and power is the American name and game, for some of us anyways.

Insider trading is not Illegal for the people that govern the laws? Someone missed this while making the congressional process.

My only real point is that we criticize/ stereotype the poor for spending money that they don’t have when our government is BILLIONS of Dollars in debt. There are people on welfare and people who are not. There are people who abuse the system for small gains and people who make large gains off the system.

I don’t have all of the answers and I don’t think that there is a simple solution because humans are apart of the equation.

Peace Out Girl Scouts

IDK

I feel like writing but I have nothing to write about at the moment so i will just swing from the hip and all off the cuff. So here we GO!

It is funny because I am not not ashamed to say that I am a feminist! Ooops! did I just drop the big F bomb?yes...yea i did. Now before you conjure images of Big super butch lesbians burning bras they never wear, stop and think you are more than likely a Feminist as well. Most people are and just don't associate with the meaning of feminism because of what mainstream media has turned this counter culture into. If you think women should earn the same wage for doing the same job, your a feminist. I could spew out tons of other things that would make you a feminist. If you are not, then you probably don't have the access to the internet in order to read this post lol.

I have lost my train of thought so I will just go with this thing that just hopped into the double dutch ropes. Why the hell is there not a more comfortable spooning/cuddling position for men. Not only do we have to do all of the work but we have to be uncomfortable as well! I am pretty sure every time I have cuddled some part of my anatomy has fallen asleep due to an awkward angle. I mean seriously we get the raw end of the deal when it comes to a lot of things being men but I guess the agony of child birth is a fair compromise.

I really have no idea what to write about so im just putting these random ramblings down on...e-ink?

I guess since i dont know what to post about I will just post a video for you to watch and leave you with advice

I was once told by an older gentlemen that you should never regret anything that you do, pertaining to non-illegal things of course, he was mainly talking about relationships at the time.  So have fun with your time because you only have one go around. If you want to do something or give something a go DO IT! be the person that you want to be!

Peace Out Girl Scouts

Pay me no mind

Okay so let me start off by saying that I must be on my period or something because I am typically not this depressing 98% of the time. So seriously unless you want to hear how my brain rationalizes the inconsistencies in my life then not reading any further is understandable. These Resee's hearts will keep me company through this endeavor.

We are who we are based on our past life experiences. So as much as you may be in love with or loathe the very air a person from your past breathes, they are as much apart of you as you are of yourself. Something they may have done has shaped how you now perceive present events. Most of us have been hurt in the past and have put up the age old "wall" to keep ourselves from feeling the low again. Some of us, yours truly, have put up physical, emotional, and mental walls for one reason or another. Part of this I know is because of my societal obligations as a "man".

What the hell is a man anyways besides a social construct that was created a really long time ago, I  say this because carbon dating sucks, that has its basis deeply rooted into each and every one of us even if we fight it tooth and nail.   

Back to the subject at hand... I am just tired of being the guy that is sweet and nice. The guy that is the kind of guy that you marry and not date. Which by the way is one of the most moronic lies I have ever heard someone say more than once. Any who, it is beginning to erk me in all the wrong ways as I watch people around me hooking up, getting booed up, and settling for the silver medal and happy. My real issue is I have NEVER HAD A FUCKING NORMAL LOOK AT A RELATIONSHIP! When it comes to me, you would think a writer on a television show was writing every social interaction I have with something with a vagina. I KNOW WAY TOO MANY FUCKING PEOPLE. I almost want to leave the state or the country to find someone that I don't know their ex, brother, sister, mom, or Dad (mainly the ex part).   I get weird situations, like a girls in a 2 year relationship with a house and has slept with one of your close friends and claims to really like you but there is something wrong, of fucking course there is, she flakes goes back to the friend.

Now I feel like I have maybe an above average read on women but that doesn't mean shit in the grand scheme of the roller coaster ride of courtship. You can be certain and be dead wrong all at the same time because of how your emotions cloud your judgement and the fact that you can't read minds. Oh! and apparently wanting a girl that I can hold a conversation with without a valley girl "whhhhaaaaattt?" coming out means that I am picky.


Its really whatever I have just got my panties in a bunch tonight. Please no Aww's or It will happens. I have herd it all before and the story is still the same at the end of the day.

Normality is the one thing my life lacks which makes it an amazing and depressing place to live in........

Peace Out Girl Scouts

Happy...ness

Okay so im in a low place somewhere between the bottom of my bed and the floor. So if youw have already figured out from past post or the littla avatar thats not an avatar but a photo...I am of the Dark Tanned American lineage. I am in a bad place mainly because of my job but of course you know, when you climb into that cave you tend to remember all of the things you have tucked away down there. The big thing that I try to keep locked in the trunk under 200lbs of trash, has somehow gotten out as of a few hours ago. I am under constant pressure from my family to find a girl do the settling thing and make the babies. There however is one major thing that is holdong me back. I dont really have a preference but I have a need in life to make a mixed caramel baby, and that requires a little vanilla to make. Sadly enough I am not far enough on the spectrum to get this elusive creature called the girlfriend. Im not the super dork that can get a super  dorky vanilla chick, nor am I thugish enough to pull that elusive daddy hating girl. Here is my normal run of things: 1) Damn girl you fine, 2) Hey lil momma...wel more like hello my name is ___and I think you are very lovely, 3) Oh well you are very nice and very unlike a lot of the people I know, 4) A friend of said girl sees that I am trying and decides to let me know that she dosent like people with this dark a tan, or she says my father would kill me if we dated.
I am by no means using this as an excuse, it is simply just the culmanation of my experiences over the last 11 years. And no this was not brought upon by the big vday lol ( sounds like big vagina day). 
Im just a Tanned gentelman looking for his pillar of salt to lick from time to time with either hot sauce, chocolate, or vanilla topping....swirl is ok to! :)
Peace Out Girl Scouts

What I learned on Tuesday

Crazy in love thats what you get! lol

So let me start off by saying that the most adorable thing ever happened at work today. There is a lady who is 86 at my job and she has a husband who needs a lot of care and she does everything she can, including working for minimum wage at a retail store, for him to make sure he is okay. This 90 year old man got up and rolled himself down to the store and brought her some flowers. Now that may not seem adorable to you, but it was the most adorable thing ever to see. She was on cloud nine because he had not done anything like this in 8 years for her. And after he left the first thing she did was ask fir a break so that she could call him and make sure he made it home safe. 52 years.....one more time FIFTY TWO! years of being married and they care for each other with such passion and love. Sadly I think that is what is wrong with how relationships have turned into the next ADD thing our society does. We treat relationships now as if they are a shinny new car that you can just trade in the next time a brand new model comes out or if you need to be more "fuel efficient."

Couldn't help myself

I don't necessarily hate Valentine's day but I will say that I am not a fan of it. When there is a holiday that causes depression for an entire week across a country as vast as the United States of....ummmm what is this big continents name again? Eh, whatever. I still think it should be a day where men get gifts instead of buying gifts for women ( which we are required by social law to do ALL of the time!). Show your man how much you care with a set of tools, made of chocolate of course, or just do something he likes on the 14th. Anyone who says V-day goes both ways has obviously never been a normal individual. Okay so moving on from my slight distain of the subject.

What I learned today is that it is the little things that really matter (unless its seeing a pic of Kim Kays Tay's first thing in the morning!) the most to people. I saw an 82 year old woman with the biggest smile on her face all day because of a small gesture and other women at work with a giddy up in their step because of a card, a call, or a small amount of flowers. I think everyone can do well to take note of the little things. Learn the favorite color, candy, nascar driver, song, or anything that the other person is adamant about.

Take Time


Peace Out Girl Scouts

Florida Against Higher Education

Florida against higher education

Um..... Yea so apparently the state of Florida, this great backwards tropical state that I live in, is going to cut the budget for my Alma Mater by 50%.......yea. I don't get how you can choose one school that has so many grants and publications and other things. They want to cut 400 million dollars....let me say that again...$400,000,000 (million) Dollars!!!!!! And 1/4th of that is being taken from one of the 4 major universities in Florida (that is not a stab at UCF ). 128million dollars is what they want to cut from USF and that is some major BullS**t....no politically correct pun intended. Come on Florida really? really? I mean you can't ever get a vote right and you constantly wonder why we are farther behind in our educational system that other states? Why can I not get a job out of state? Oh thats right because Florida wont pay for its residents to have a quality education even though we continue to pay our sales and state taxes every day. Oh wait whats that? You don't want everyone to have the ability to go to college anymore? Message heard loud and clear Mr. Richy Rich. If you can find a way to keep those less fortunate down then you can successfully preserve that perceived cultured way of life.....Classists!!! and they call liberals communists bwahahahahahahahaha. What do you think making education unattainable is? hmmmmmm? think about it.


Peace Out Girl Scout  

V-day Sting....?

Okay so i know that this is the most depressing time of the year, but oddly enough, the fact that I am once again not hooked up with even a date that I can call some crazed made up old saint's name (Valentine),  this is not the source of my lament.

I am at on of those things in life called a crossroad and i hate crossroads. I seem to hit these stupid things constantly in this elongated short existence on this speck of a blue planet. I don't know which road to take, mainly because of the stupidity of taking either. The smart choice would be to just sit there in the middle and hope there are fish and a pond.

 I currently work for one of our nations super corporations and let us just say that it does not fit me, the free spirited thinker, very well at all. I know that if i stay here I will be miserable, but I also know that choosing the other path of finding a new job would only mean a 80/20 percent chance of finding that same debilitating corporate injection mold of depression force feeding me through a ram like hot plastic. Here to simply only do one thing.... make money for someone else who I never see. I know i am a dreamer and eventually the system will start asking me to put the new header on my TPS reports, but until then I am gunna be naive and continue to think that my thoughts carry weight until someone else who has taken the same path recognizes the truth in my words, and is willing to give me a shot and having a voice at something better, nay, greater than myself. My only regret is that I was never high enough on the side of blue collar life to pursue my dreams of being in professional sports.

I have a passion for bowling, golf, tennis, and pretty much any other non contact sport Yet I have never had the  resources to get better at them past my own natural abilities. If i could go to the range every day and hang around one of the lower tours for a few years I would be happier than a gremlin taking apart an airplane mid flight! Sadly I don't have that money or that time to put in now that I am all growned up and stuff.

Maybe I'll give somebody an idea that will be a huge money maker and i can quit sad life.


Peace Out Girl Scouts    

I will always love you

I will always love you and your lyrics and the way your voice filled a room, and made people feel instantly relaxed, amazed, and happy. Your singing of the National Anthem will forever be the only one that I believe is the greatest of all time. Thank You!

I remember being a hopeless romantic type of child, you know the kid that would fall easy and try to use poetry and be nice to girls, and listening to the music of R&B artists that were talking more about love rather than the sex fueled artists of today. Granted I had to change a few of Whitney's lyrics because saying, " how will i know if he really loves me" would have only hurt the already rocky sexual perception people had about me. I remember singing your songs in my parents car, on road trips, on math team outings, and even in my own car when i earned my freedom! Granted, once the balls dropped i could no longer come close to hitting the superbly titillating high notes. Karaoke time! OMG!!! I Will Always Love You will probably be one of the top 3 songs this year in any Karaoke bar. I will continue to believe anything is possible and continue to listen to your music whenever my hopelessly romantic heart cries out for something to give it joy, passion, relief from pain, and Inspiration.........Thank You

This is one of my favorite songs that means a lot to me and that is sung by two very amazing vocalists.

Peace Out Girl Scouts

   

Gate Keepers

http://www.zazzle.com/trust_me_im_a_gate_keeper_tshirt-235462900767612662

Ok so the shirt above could never be anymore true than it is when it is worn by a woman. I have had this concept for a few years now. Basically, I call all women, mainly american or countries with westward thinking, gatekeepers, and for very good reason. Have you ever stopped to think about who in our world really controls things? No? Well maybe you should stop and think about it long and hard. Men are said to be leaders of the free world and of the non-free world, but when you take a step back and think about more than the penis, dick, hit stick, dong, shlong, missile, pistol, water gun, baby maker, or the legend. I have called women Gate Keepers now for about 7 years now, because I have realized they have the keys to any relationships future. Now this statement purely only applies to the 99% of women who still have historic views on how a relationship is suppose to kick off. SERIOUSLY WOULD IT KILL YOU TO JUST SIMPLY LET A GUY KNOW YOU LIKE THEM?? Okay large word yelling aside, guys typically have to do all of the works to get the show started and get the raw end of the stick when it comes to the work in the relationship. We are normally working to meet the girls expectations because that is what we are taught from birth. Now don't get mad at me, I love the magic of Disney (with that being said here we go), but the stories do nothing but tell little boys that they have to be big and strong, macho, or the cutest guy around to get a girl. It teaches little girls so many more things, but for the sake of this argument we will only say it teaches them to go for the douchebags. This however is only .0001x-100*100th (yea do that math problem with decimal blocks) of the issue as a whole.  So I guess the point of my mildly cohesive rant is that Ladies should learn that they hold the key. The key to a first date, the key to a first kiss, to a hand hold, to a friendship, to a marriage, to an engagement (well thats really the dad with the shot gun, but you catch my drift), and the greatest thing of all.....The BEDROOM BOOM!, or sex for the conventional person. Now, men you have to respect the rules of entrance into the gates of the playland... :-).  Don't pick the lock or break down the door! Sure a BNE sounds like fun but you will ultimately loose in the long run and the doors to that gate will never open or close properly again... So just stop and understand that it is worth the wait and being handed the key.

  

POGS!!! (Peace Out Girl Scout)

Bounced

Don't make me a rebound
Don't make me a rebound
make me feel slightly profound
Don't put me up, just to let me down
Why am I luck, why am I lucky
Am I lucky to be stuck
or just to have a  chance as a suitable fuck
I really hate rhyming ill just speak from the soul

Okay this is crap
just used me for a gain
and I know your not to blame but,
I just need to say, that
you suck and need to grow up
find some time to take credit
for the things you have done
continue contradicting yourself
and you will find in time
that what you want, you will never find
as long as you can't be true,
to you


P.O.G.S.

Golf Demo Day

Bout the time aye?

Yea so I had a great time today at the Golfsmith Demo Day at Cheval Golf and Country Club;....wish i could afford to work there. So I fell in love with the Adam's Speedline F12 LS today, and maybe a few other of the other major manufacturers stuff. Taylormade was there and I was able to hit the new Rocketballz 3 wood and I would have been all about buying the 3 wood or Driver if I didn't feel like the guys at the demo day were douches. First of all while me and my half black friend, Zach, were easily the darkest people there; I want to stress that only a few really awkward times was I ever in question of how people viewed me...i.e. Racism. Anyways, I was having the best driving day of my life!!! I don't think I had a drive under 280 yards and I am pretty sure the home owner at the edge of the range will hate whoever it was that hit his house multiple times (me!).  I still am not sure if i want to spend the money on a nice driver since i am still learning the game. I have a lot of reps to put in before I even think about getting into competition golf, and a lot of money. I wish i could go back in time and have my dad put me into a summer golf program or something like that. Im okay at bowling; well maybe slightly above average, modesty is one of my redeeming qualities; I do like bowling but there is no money to be made unless you are one of the top 10 in the country. I like money but I also like doing what I love, which can be difficult at times to pin down because I have love ADD....i swear! Back on point; I only got 3 swings with the new R11s driver and the stiff flex shaft was more flexible than the Senior Flex shaft of most companies....Tee hee hee senior flex isn't stiff :-). Any whoo, I hope that within 2 years my athletic ability allows me to start playing local tournaments and maybe slowly move up in time enough to be on the senior PGA Tour, or I can simply do something with all of this random brain activity to make myself a billionaire, millionaire, thousandaire maybe?  Maybe I'll be a rapper or something because in the words of Collin Berry, " Rappers look like they have a fun lifestyle!" I will do something....Hip Hop Hooray Hoo!!!

Peace out Girl Scout!

Getting back to Dork

This is my first real blog post ever so bear with me....get the word play?

OK, so here I am just like 70% of America! Confused about what to do with the rest of my life and wondering if I am ever going to be able to find that other person that can handle all of this and not be culture shocked whenever they meet my family. I know that is asking a ton for any woman out there to deal with, but hey, there isn't anything I can do about it. If while you read this I begin to curse and use more foul language; fucking deal with it because its probably something that was dormant that just flows to the keys as I am typing.

I miss being 10 years old, and by that I mean I miss being me at 10 years old. I was such a spunky go getter and I had great ambitions to do great things and invent the next biggest thing for the hell of it. Now I am just working at Target and on a path to be miserable and doing the same thing for 35 years. Side Track:
    Ok so you can agree, disagree, or just blow this part off but i truthfully dont give a flying fuck at the moment. I am blessed to have been born here in the USofA, but that blessing comes at a cost. That cost is that im insignificant because of a few things. I am a male which allows me some obvious priveledges in this society, which for the record I am not okay with. I can argue that point day and night and to no avail will a valid conclusion be reached. My point in this bit of rambling is simply that, I know I am black, brow, african-american,or whatever. I don't need a reminder of it every time I dance. I don't need you to tell me that the only reason I get away with certain things is because the color of my skin and the goofball rolls of people of that color in the past used humor to make it out of the situation they were in. OH, and I fucking swear if I hear one more fucking thing about black people taking over white sports I am going to fucking get some money and air an ad to tell people to stop complaining and get off their asses and train if being a pro athlete is their dream....FUCK YOU FOX NEWS btdubs.


I can't be angry at any girl who dosen't think im cute, hell most mornings i wake up and my alec-esteem isn't 100%, but if you see me trying and want none of the lovin...just let me know! I feel like I have wasted my fucking time when I, a male who happens to be of African lineage, try to get to know you better than a friend and wont even get the opportunity to step up to the plate and strike out. 


Im not enough of anything for people apparently, and  I know and understand that I have some girls that would date me in a heartbeat. I apologize to any girl who I have turned down, or given a false impression that I wanted to be theirs and I really didn't. I don't really know what to say on this subject because my brain has this need to rationalize and realize that I am going through potentially the same thing I am putting someone else through.


Anywho thats all I got Peace!






Alec Mathews